WHO'S GOT A KISS FOR THE WICKED WITCH?
Who's got a smoke for the reluctant virgin?
I like that a lot. There are any number of stories to be gotten by expressing sympathy for the characters we've all been set up to despise.
from the laughing
I was trying to work up something, probably about the moon, but gave it up after only a few words. Probably I'd've gotten further if the sketch had been better.