Some people get hysterical when they receive a Christmas card with a tasteful graphic of a glass ornament on the front and a bland HAPPY HOLIDAYS within. Not I. So many friends of the household have contrary opinions or difficult personalities that such cards aren't even on the radar. Indeed, we receive so many Godless Atheist Christmas Cards that every year we have a competition for the Most Godless Atheist Christmas Card of the Year.
And the winner this year is . . . (Drum roll, please) . . . my sister Mary! Her card, shown above, beat out some genuine stunners this year, and well deserved to do so. It rejects everything that is sacred about the Christmas season in favor of a secular Christmas -- and then rejects the secular Christmas as well! All in a single bleak and nihilistic yet elegant image. The Not At All Nepotistic Blue Ribbon Panel of Family saw this card and found themselves staring into the Abyss.
Well done, Mary!
This year's winner proves an important point, that you don't have to be Godless or an atheist to win the Godless Atheist Christmas Card Competition. (I know my sister, and she is neither.) You simply have to have a weird sense of humor.
And since I know your next question . . .
The card was made by Main Squeeze Press. You can find their Etsy shop here. It doesn't seem to be among their current offerings, but their current offerings are well worth a look. And who knows? If you write them, maybe they've still got a couple of cards left.